Tag: LocalAuthor

Margerumalia – Christmas Lights and Dental Blights

Eric Margerum

Newsletter – Nov. 29,2024

Two days after draping Christmas lights across our front bushes we got the first snow of the season. I was patting myself on the back while taking this photo, but to give credit where credit is due, it was Debbie’s initiative to trim those bushes making it all possible. She’s a go-getter gardener while I’m a reluctant one.   

You know what else I’m reluctant about? Getting a tooth pulled. 

As I’ve explained to many dentists and their assistants, whatever you may be doing in my mouth, it’s far worse in my imagination. I hum tunelessly to distract myself from my own fears. Like a white noise machine, it disrupts the brainwaves that deliver images of a bloodbath like The Texas Chainsaw Massacre. 

So I’m lying back in the dentist chair, inhaling a mix of oxygen and nitrous oxide—laughing gas, hah, not in my experience—knowing that the dentist is running late because he got stuck in traffic. You know those stories of surgeons who accidentally amputate the wrong limb? I don’t want him to arrive in a frenzy, knowing that people are waiting. I don’t want him to be in a hurry to catch up with his schedule and pull out the wrong tooth! 

It’s not like he can put it back.

He arrives, introduces himself, and I immediately pat him on the shoulder and sympathize with the traffic situation. “I’ve lived in LA,” I tell him, “I know what it’s like. You’re gonna need a moment to take a few deep breaths.” And study the tooth chart.

There ya go, Eric, establish rapport. Let him talk about idling on the interstate, let him get it out of his system. We’re friends now. He’s not about to pull the wrong tooth out of a friend’s mouth. 

The assistant joins him and they compare plans for the weekend. She had planned to put up Christmas lights, but failed to get them out before the snowfall. 

“I did!” I slurred, the numbness starting to take a hold of my cheek. I pulled out my phone and shared the picture above which they admired. More rapport, more camaraderie. Pretty soon I’d be humming tunelessly, but at least I was a third person in the room, not just another mouth full of teeth. 

“This one will probably come out in pieces,” the dentist warned me. 

“Because it has a crown?” I asked. 

“Yes, and the root canal that was done many years ago.” 

That’s the right tooth! I was still fearful of the procedure, but at least I knew it would be the right one. 

I survived, of course, to write this harrowing account of Eric The Tuneless Hummer. 

TTFN!

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My middle grade novel, The Most Amazing Museum of Los Angeles is available through The BookBaby Bookshop at https://store.bookbaby.com/book/the-most-amazing-museum-of-los-angeles

Margerumalia – Homing The Last Two Kittens

Eric Margerum

Newsletter – November 22, 2024

This is a photo of the last two kittens the day before we captured them off the back deck. They are Trisha (calico) and the OOC (Other Orange Cat). The temperatures fell, as did the rain, just after their rescue and we’re pleased they’re living together in a warm, dry home with a man who really cares about them. 

We used a humane trap this time and the only scratches I suffered were the result of transferring Trish from one cat carrier to the other. She was scared to death and escaped my grip like a cat outta hell, running around our little downstairs bathroom, spraying food, water, and cat litter everywhere. I already had my tetanus shot from the previous rescue and hadn’t completed my prescription of antibiotics so I was safe, if somewhat bruised and bloodied…again. 

The capture of the kittens was a bit of a comedy of errors. Trish got trapped right away. We knew when we heard her scream in fright, but the OOC was a different story. The humane cages, if you’re not familiar with them, have a spring loaded door that snaps shut when the animal steps on the metal plate at the end where the food is. First the OOC walked around to investigate the food from the outside, trying to reach it with his paw. We watched from the window quietly urging him to enter the cage from the other side. When he finally did walk in to eat, he accidentally wedged the little food bowl under the metal plate preventing it from triggering the door. He ate his fill as we despaired of capturing him at all. Suddenly the bowl moved and the door slammed shut. We did it!

They huddled together in our cat carrier while I texted my friend about coming to get them. He rushed out to buy supplies and arrived in a couple of hours.

Today, the report from their adoptive human is that they’re slowly warming up to him and the OOC is letting himself be petted. Trish is more standoffish just as she was on our back deck. I’ve heard the psychology of animals and humans says that adaptive behavior can be learned even by watching another’s progress. I expect she’ll come around.

Unless we capture their mother, Tabitha, I won’t be sharing more wild cat stories. She really needs to be spayed to prevent more pregnancies. Tabby won’t thank us for the experience, but it’s what she needs. We’ll also need to find a larger cage! The humane trap we have is too small for her.

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If you received this email because it was forwarded to you by a subscriber, welcome. You can subscribe as well by following the link on my website: ericmargerum.com. A free story awaits you there.

Margerumalia – They’re, Their, and There

Eric Margerum

Newsletter November 15, 2024

Joe going to his new home. (Named in honor of the president.)

This picture shows the second kitten we captured off our back deck. This time it was my turn to get bloody and go to Urgent Care for a tetanus shot and antibiotics! We’ll use the humane trap next time and save ourselves from those little sharp claws. 

The poor guy huddled in the back of the dog cage for several hours and wouldn’t touch food or water. It’s a pretty frightening experience! We assured our neighbors (and the doctor) that he never tried to bite us. He was just surprised and frightened. Our neighbors are a kind, gentle couple and I know they’ll coax him to trust and love them. 

Good news, I told the doctor in Urgent Care about the dentist I’d be consulting about having a tooth extraction, and she gave me an antibiotic that would protect me from the hand-piercing infections AND the infected tooth. Two for one!

And who doesn’t love a good two-fer toother!

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Last week I shared a poem called “Morel, Morsel, Moral, Moray” that I hope you enjoyed. This week I have another piece of verse I wrote because of a comment from a reader: Looking forward to your treatise on “There, their, and they’re.”  

At first I laughed and shrugged off the possibility that I could compose such a thing, but it kept on playing through my mind like an ear worm and I later replied, “Challenge Accepted!”

They’re, Their, and There

“They’re going to win! They are! They are!”

“They’re going to win,” said June.

“A pin for the win. Their prize,” said May.

“A pin for the win. Their prize!” 

“A blue ribbon there,” agreed their friend April. 

“They’re blue ribbon winners indeed!”

And there you have it!

TTFN! 

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My middle grade novel, The Most Amazing Museum of Los Angeles is available through The BookBaby Bookshop at https://store.bookbaby.com/book/the-most-amazing-museum-of-los-angeles

Margerumalia – Morel, Morsel, Moral, Moray

Eric Margerum

Newsletter – November 8, 2024

[Photo Credit: www.out-grow.com]

Morel, Morsel, Moral, Moray 

A morel is a mushroom to enjoy in tasty bits.

A morsel is a tasty bit to eat in starts and fits.  

A moral is a lesson learned by dropping morel morsels.

A moray is a toxic eel that’s lacking fins or dorsals.

FACT CHECK: Some moray eels are not toxic and are considered a delicacy. In fact, they taste like chicken. Seriously. I read that on the internet. And we all know that’s a reliable source!

A crossword puzzle set me on the path of writing this little ditty. I had a five letter word to complete that started with M-O-R and I started riffing on possibilities in the margins of the newspaper. (Yes, I still get a paper newspaper, don’t judge.) From those M-O-R words I developed the little poem above. 

If you liked that one, you can check out my April 19 newsletter featuring an equally scintillating composition called “Caret, Carat, Carrot.” (All of my previous newsletters are on my website at ericmargerum.com under POSTS. You can search by the poem title or the date.)

Maybe if I write enough erudite poesy, I can gather them into a famous anthology of verses. And you’ll be able to say, “I was reading him long before this publication hit the best seller list!” People will be so impressed! 

You know what else is impressive? The website where I found the beautiful morel photo. [www.out-grow.com] This is not a paid advertisement, I don’t even like mushrooms, but if I did, this website looks pretty thorough and has plenty of advice on growing your own mushrooms. Just saying. 

Catch ya next week. TTFN! 

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If you received this email because it was forwarded to you by a subscriber, welcome. You can subscribe as well by following the link on my website: ericmargerum.com. A free story awaits you there.

Margerumalia – Opening Night in Elsewhere

Eric Margerum

Newsletter – November 1, 2024

Gmail and Yahoo recently updated their security systems. Please take a moment to add my email address [eric@ericmargerum.com] to your contacts or safe senders list to prevent my newsletters from landing in your Junk or Spam box.

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It’s opening night of Elsewhere and I’m excited to see the performances unfold. The background projections and lights are all set up, the costumes, props, and sound effects were all found, borrowed, or created, and the programs and posters are freshly printed. It’s show time! 

I’m always proud to see how far the students have advanced through the years. At an age where they’re finding their place in the world, their theatre experiences give them a chance to experiment in a safe and supportive environment. After all, it’s just pretend, right? So you can express the emotions of your character at full volume on stage and, instead of getting in trouble, you get kudos for “acting out.” What other aspect of life gives you permission to embody that behavior? 

That’s not to say there isn’t real depth of feeling to go along with those experiences. A couple of years ago there was a student who had to step into a small role at the last minute. With only about three or four lines to say at the beginning and end of the play she broke into a panic attack on opening night. “It’s all real,” she sobbed in the dressing room, “it’s all so real.” 

I reassured her that she didn’t need to go on, that we’d find someone else to do it script-in-hand, but she did it, and did it well. She experienced that crashing reality of pretend where your emotional self experiences the reality of the make-believe and the feelings are all so real. 

This year, that same actor is appearing in Elsewhere as the nightmarish tooth fairy commanding her minions, the tooth goblins, to extract teeth from the mouths of the children. She’s deliciously evil and so distant from that younger version who broke down in the dressing room. She’s come so far! 

Writing goals, right? What writer wouldn’t want to see their storytelling have that kind of emotional impact, that kind of potential for growth? It’s all in the experience. The only way forward is through.

Speaking of acting out, I hope you had a delightful Halloween!

TTFN

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The Most Amazing Museum of Los Angeles is available through The BookBaby Bookshop at https://store.bookbaby.com/book/the-most-amazing-museum-of-los-angeles

Margerumalia – A Happy Day in PA

Eric Margerum

Newsletter – October 25, 2024

Gmail and Yahoo recently updated their security systems. Please take a moment to add my email address [eric@ericmargerum.com] to your contacts or safe senders list to prevent my newsletters from landing in your Junk or Spam box.

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I’m going to draw the curtain on the Marcie Saga with this photo from Pennsylvania. Her forever Mama sent it to me a day after taking her home and it’s endearing to see Marcie thriving in her new home alongside the toy bell mouse we bought for her. A toy she chased enthusiastically all over the basement! We feared Marcie’s reaction to the long car ride, but she settled into the trip very nicely. 

I now have a taste of what foster parents might feel when a child moves out of their home. That was always the plan and there’s great joy in knowing the child is happy and healthy. I learned that a caring foster parent can’t help but feel the empty space left behind, longing for reassurances that the child is doing well. We’ve gone through that. 

A few days ago I opened the back door to give food to Tabitha (Marcie’s birth mama) and one of the orange kittens. He let me pet him about seven or eight times while he gobbled his food and quickly broke into a satisfied purr just like Marcie’s. Tabby watched with interest but kept her distance—she’s a survivor.

By the way, a couple of newsletters ago I set up a vote to find out your favorite image of Marcie for a children’s picture book. At the the time I joked that it was good preparation for the national elections. THAT was well prophesied! It was a dead heat between A, B, and C at 30% each with the original photo capturing the last 10%. Haha!

I hope you exercise your right to vote if you haven’t already. I did. 

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I need to go create a poster for the high school play I’m directing, so I’m making this short. The cast of Elsewhere will perform on November 1st & 2nd and would appreciate your positive vibes for a successful run. 

TTFN!

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If you received this email because it was forwarded to you by a subscriber, welcome. You can subscribe as well by following the link on my website: ericmargerum.com. A free story awaits you there.

Margerumalia – Adoption Time

Eric Margerum

Newsletter – Oct. 18, 2024

I promised myself I wouldn’t cry.

Marcie met her forever Mama today and Debbie and I said our good-byes before she drove off to Pennsylvania. Our next door neighbor and her husband actually live in PA not in their house next door. It’s a long story. We really like them and hope they move back soon.

I’d gotten used to our little rescued ragamuffin warming my lap as I typed one-handed at my computer, my other hand cradling her behind to prevent her from sliding off and plopping onto the floor. Cats land on their feet and this little kitten developed her agility in the wild climbing trees and wrestling with her siblings, but she’s also bumped her head against my desk a couple times. 

A few days ago I woke Marcie up by coming downstairs and she mewed at me about twenty times. She’d finally found her voice, but what did she want? She was purring fervidly so I knew she was glad to see me. Eventually I asked her if she had woken from a bad dream and she pressed her nose against my lips. That was a yes. We sat quietly together for a while after that. 

I’ll miss the daily routine of visiting her four times a day.

I’ll miss Marcie’s spectacular leaps at my hand weights while I’m working out.

I’ll miss finding Marcie on the couch downstairs in her favorite napping place.

I’ll miss the warm spot in my lap where she used to curl up.

Aw, shoot. I promised myself I wouldn’t cry.

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We were planning to rescue one or all of the other three kittens, but Debbie did some research and learned that no one wants more cats. Not the Cat Cafe, or PETCO, or the no-kill shelters. Now we’re thinking about a catch-and-release plan to get them spayed and neutered. We already have an indoor cat who needs an insulin shot every twelve hours, with a feeding schedule to match. 

Wherever you are, I urge to consider adopting a cat or dog if have any room in your home, your budget, and your heart. They really could use your love and attention. And your love will be generously repaid with interest. 

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The Most Amazing Museum of Los Angeles is available through The BookBaby Bookshop at https://store.bookbaby.com/book/the-most-amazing-museum-of-los-angeles

Margerumalia – Vote For Your Favorite Kitten

Eric Margerum

Newsletter – October 11, 2024

In the spirit of the election season I thought I’d give you a chance to practice your democratic rights in the lead-up to our national election.

Don’t worry about registration, you qualified when you signed up for this newsletter.

Politics aside, I’d like to know which version of Marcie you think would make the best model for a children’s picture book.

I’ve researched the categories and my target appears to be for “Ages 4–8: Early (easy) readers.” I envision each page with an illustration having a short paragraph. Three sentences tops.

Having played around with the filters on the app, I’ve learned that Marcie’s appearance will never be duplicated from one photo to the next, so I’ll need to find an illustrator to provide consistency and characterization. I’ve included the original photo I took (Option D) both for your reference and for the option of just using real pictures.

Do you have children in your family? Do you have access to your inner child? I’d welcome your feedback on why you think one version would be the better choice.

My new subscribers may want to read Marcie’s story that started this project. You can find it in last week’s Margerumalia, October 4th. It’s on my website, ericmargerum.com, under POSTS. 

Which version would be the best for a children’s picture book?

A – the Cartoonizer

B – the 3D cartoon

C – the watercolor 

D – the original photo

(If you’re reading this as a blog post, you can send a reply. I don’t know how to duplicate the poll contained in my email newsletter.) 

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I’m also directing a play called Elsewhere at our local high school written by Don Zolidis. I’ve chosen to produce several of his plays not only because of his wit and characterization, but also because of his flexibility in cast size and gender. You can learn more about his plays and novels at donzolidis.com. (I haven’t read his novels but I  admire and trust his his writing skills and wouldn’t hesitate to give one a try.)

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If you received this email because it was forwarded to you by a subscriber, welcome. You can subscribe as well by following the link on my website: ericmargerum.com. A free story awaits you there.

Margerumalia – A Kitten Called Marcie

Eric Margerum

Newsletter October 4, 2024

I think I may need to create a children’s picture book.

We’ve been feeding an outdoor cat on our back deck for about a year-and-a-half. Her brother, too, until he disappeared in early spring. Tabitha has been showing up faithfully every morning—as has Rockie Raccoon—to get her bowl of cat food. We’ve seen her grow wide with pregnancy twice. The first litter never made it to our house but this summer she brought over four adorable kittens: two orange and two calicos. 

We immediately ran out to buy kitten food! 

Over the next few weeks we discussed how to capture and rescue them. Our neighbor saw the kittens follow Tabitha across the street on her security camera and declared that she wanted one! 

Meanwhile, Rockie had also given birth and started bringing her three babies to our house for some of that delicious cat food. 

When we went out of town, the woman coming to feed and give insulin to our indoor cat reported that there was a bit of a kerfuffle between the cats and the raccoons after which the cats stopped showing up. Several days after we came home, Tabitha returned but with only three of her four kittens.

We were sad about the lost calico. Our back yard falls away to a heavily wooded ravine and we’ve seen foxes and coyotes slink through our back yard. The kitten was very likely prey to one of these carnivores. We also felt guilty about not having rescued them before we left. 

Several days later the two orange kittens disappeared. Now we were only feeding Tabby and the last calico. If only we had captured them before they became coyote food. I started standing guard for the early morning feedings to keep the raccoons, at least, well away from the cats. 

A few days ago, the remaining calico was all alone on our deck, clearly waiting for her mother, mewing for her, looking for her. She had fallen asleep in an empty flower box when her mother showed up, so Debbie went outside to wake the kitten, suddenly realizing she was within arm’s length. She could grab her! 

“Eric” I heard her cry, “get the cat carrier!”

I ran upstairs, grabbed the cat carrier, and rushed to the back door. Debbie stood there with bloody arms holding the kitten by the scruff of the neck. We quickly shoved her in the carrier, locked the cage and Debbie went inside to wash up and apply antiseptic to her scratches. (She would later get a tetanus shot and antibiotics just to be on the safe side.) 

Debbie was a hero! 

I shared a look with Tabitha on the stepping stones in the yard and she looked at me. I got the distinct feeling she was saying, “Okay, you’ve got her. I understand. You take care of her.” She had been pushing, even swatting, the kitten away from the cat bowl so she was already pushing her out of the nest, so to speak. 

I had named the two calicos “Marco” because they each had an orange mark on their foreheads: mark-o. Did you know that only one in 3000 calicos are male? I didn’t. Our daughter’s fiancé suggested changing her name to Marcie.

Marcie warmed up to us immediately, purring like crazy every time we visited her little quarantine downstairs. Then we gave her a bath in the sink using gloves and Dawn dish soap. After that bit of trauma we subjected Marcie to a flea bath and though she struggled she never tried to bite, and has always purred ferociously every time we’re with her. She loves being petted! So affectionate. 

Soon we took Marcie to the vet for her kitten shots, blood draw, mani-clawi*, and worming medicine. She was officially pronounced healthy and adorable. We took her home, gave her the run of the TV room, and later, the basement. She loves her toys and running freely.

As for the picture book, we now have dozens of cute kitten pictures, and I thought it could serve as a metaphor for children who are fostered and then adopted, to give them comfort by seeing a version of their own stories. (Marcie thinks so, too, she just trotted into my office in full purr mode, batted a paw against my ankle, and leaped into my lap.) 

The story’s not over yet. We still need to hand her over to the neighbor when she gets back in town. 

AND, there’s a huge plot twist!

Debbie held Marcie up in the tall windows of the TV room the other day so Tabitha could she see her baby and know she was taken care of. Tabby stared for a long time. Marcie did, too. So guess what happened the next night. 

We were watching TV and I heard the rattle of the ceramic bowl outside. The raccoons. It was getting time to take in the cat food. I stood up, looked outside, and saw… 

Tabitha and her THREE kittens! 

I’m guessing you’re asking all the questions we were and, of course, we don’t know the answers! It had been over a week since we saw those kittens last. Where had they been while Tabby was showing up every day? Did Tabitha bring them back for us to rescue? 

Next on our list is the other calico. She’s clearly getting pushed aside by the others.

Maybe I’ll have an update for you after a week or two.

TTFN!

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*You’re right, I made up another word! I’ll define that as an animal’s mani-pedi. 

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The Most Amazing Museum of Los Angeles is available through The BookBaby Bookshop at https://store.bookbaby.com/book/the-most-amazing-museum-of-los-angeles

Margerumalia – AI, AI, OH!

Eric Margerum

Newsletter September 27, 2024

Last week I should have given credit to my wife Debbie for taking the original picture from which that anime picture was created. She also took the author photo that I’ve been using on my website. Thank you, My Love.

Like last week, I ran Debbie’s original picture through a filter for this newsletter which you see above. I did try to use the anime filter again but it removed my glasses and gave me a goatee, so I used the watercolor option instead. 

The anime picture from last week brought up a discussion with another creative artist about the ethical use of AI. I assured them that it was from a photo run through a filter, not a completely new AI creation. 

Why is this important? A filter is a tool for altering creative work, like turning a photo into B&W or enhancing the colors of a sunset. An original AI creation is actually an amalgamation of many creative artists scraped together to create something “new” by imitating their talents. They don’t get credit and they don’t get paid. 

I belong to SAG-AFTRA who decided to strike over this very issue in 2024. The studios were prepared to catalogue actor’s images by paying for them once and then reusing them in perpetuity. Forever. For free. Not only would it have been a massive pay cut for performers, it could easily be abused in any number of ways (sex and violence top the list).

Production companies spend a lot of money to hire, direct, costume, apply make-up, and transport actors. And many of these actors are earning their way toward qualifying for medical insurance and benefits. 

The strike was resolved when the studios agreed to pay for each use of an actor’s image AND get consent for its specific use. The benefit to the production company is that they can use AI to quickly direct, costume, and apply make-up for crowd scenes or other purposes. The benefit to actors and other performers is getting paid for their images and their talents.

Actors, dancers, singers, are performing artists earning money from their images and voices. The watercolor of my face above is used with my consent and the original photo was shot by my wife. The AI filter is a tool for changing the image, but not a completely new creation. I fear that distinction will get muddier by the day and I wonder where it will lead us in the creative arts. 

Some of the portals that I use to submit short stories are quite adamant that no AI generated stories are submitted, and rightfully so. But grammar-check and spell-check are tools that I use frequently and I assume they’ll be tasked to an AI program soon if not already. I hear there are AI critiques that writers can buy to improve their story telling. Do you see the muddy parts ahead? 

I don’t have the answers here, but I do plan to conscientiously consider what I do and how I do it. I think everyone should. 

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In honor of Banned Books Week I encourage you to read a banned book just to be able to make up your own mind. Some of the more famous choices include Mark Twain, Stephen King, Toni Morrison, and even Judy Blume. 

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If you received this email because it was forwarded to you by a subscriber, welcome. You can subscribe as well by following the link on my website: ericmargerum.com. A free story awaits you there.