Tag: NewWord

Margerumalia – Protaxination

Eric Margerum

Newsletter – March 7, 2025

PHOTO: freepik.com

Get out your score card and that little stubby pencil you pocketed after a game of mini-golf, it’s time to award points for my new word: Protaxination. [That’s three points for a new word.]

Protaxination is the process of finding other things to do instead of working on your taxes. (Verb: protaxinating.) [Add one point for verbinizing the noun] 

[Ooo, did you see that? I earned three more points for inventing the word verbinizing!]

I know I’ve been guilty of protaxination in years past, how about you? Was your spam folder suddenly demanding to be examined for lost emails (mark the Margerumalia as “not spam”). Have the dust bunnies under your bed hit critical mass requiring Nerf Dart™ intervention? And where DID you put that mini-golf score card you were going to show off to your friends last August? Gotta find it now!

Hold on protaxinator [two more points for developing a word for a person who protaxinates], you have a job to do. Just sit your butt down in the chair, separate your W-2’s from your 1099’s, total them up and write the corresponding numbers in lines 7 and 8. Now pull out that box of receipts, both physical and virtual, and decide whether that box of Cheez-Its® was an office expense or a meal, in which case you may only deduct 27% and write that number on line 32. Easy, right? 

Okay, I’ll admit that was oddly specific.

Quick flashback to my youth: I was walking home from high school and met up with our neighbor, Mr. Spies. He asked me how school was going and I complained about things I had to learn that I would never use, ever! He heard me out and then reflected that maybe school teaches us how to complete assignments whether we want to or not. “I don’t want to do my taxes,” he said, “but I have to do them every year whether I want to or not. Maybe the work you’re doing for that class isn’t about the subject but just learning to do the work itself.”

That actually helped.

Before you leap out of your beanbag chair to do your taxes, did you add nine points to your score card? No? You really need to sharpen that little stubby pencil. That’s not a seven, that’s a nine. Thank you. 

PUBLIC SERVICE ANNOUNCEMENT – Getting your taxes submitted sooner than later is going to be very important this year if you want to receive a timely refund. Captain Chaos and Major Mess have laid off 7,000 IRS workers so far and the resulting bottleneck will make the supply chain problems of a few years ago look like the Puppy Bowl.

TTFN 

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Margerumalia – Is An Acronym A Word?

Eric Margerum

Newsletter  June 21, 2024 

MAMLA is an acronym for The Most Amazing Museum of Los Angeles but is it a word? I’m asking for a friend. A friend who suggested that MAMLA is, in fact, my third addition to the English language — after hypernataldigitation (newsletter 5/03/24) and Margerumalia (newsletter 6/14/24). Maybe the origin of the museum name will help to suss it out.

But first: selling a book in a grocery store.

Fresh Thyme Market is an organic grocery store just three blocks from where I live and we often shop there. They keep a neat, friendly atmosphere and were very accommodating to my book signing table. I got to see neighbors, strangers, and a high school friend from years ago. I’ve also gotten pretty good at my elevator pitch for the book, describing just enough of the plot to intrigue potential readers. 

All in all I sold about half as many books as I did at the public library or Barnes & Noble, but—as I reminded myself while packing up—this is a food store, not a book store. Half as many books sold is pretty darn good, I’d say! And I left the store with a fresh perspective (pun intended). 

Next stop, the county library, date TBD, and Main Street Books in Lafayette on July 13. The Saturday Farmer’s Market on Fifth Street brings browsers to the bookstore. 

Back to MAMLA. It was inspired by MOCA, the Museum of Contemporary Art, where I spent an adventurous afternoon several years ago. I had just missed the cut-off for student rush tickets at the Ahmanson Theatre in downtown LA and found out that my parking fee was good for several hours but not good for a refund. The MOCA caught my eye and I walked a few blocks to see what I could see. 

I walked through many contemporary art exhibits, some of which bored me, like the big hall of six foot fluorescent lights hung up in as many different combinations as you can imagine. Actually, I think you could imagine several better ones. There were no colors, no sculpted neon-styles, just things like three horizontal lights and two vertical. Ho-Hum. And those fluorescents do hum!

A different exhibit really captured my imagination, though. It had huge geometrical shapes, each one painted in a solid primary or secondary color. I intended to glide through this hall but was surprised to feel vibrations emanating from each shape, almost like a musical tone. If you’ve made it to Chapter 16 in MAMLA, you’ll recognize The Gallery of Shapes and Colors. I was amazed to actually experience intrinsic emotions from each shape. That’s when I decided then to name my museum The Most Amazing Museum of Los Angeles. MAMLA.

Word (noun): a speech sound or series of speech sounds that symbolizes and communicates a meaning usually without being divisible into smaller units capable of independent use (Merriam-Webster.com). 

Yeah, I think I’m going to claim MAMLA as the third word I’ve contributed to the English language.

TTFN!